hopeful

The moon is calling for me... They both love me, I know.
He exists, the sweetest SIN... mine... my private sin. And she, the moon, my Goddess.

Was waiting for so long, so will keep on waiting for some more. With full of heart, I'm waiting!

We're touched by the moonlight, how cant they see it?

But, can't forget how your dead soul killed mine, and now I'm revived by you... And she will sing for us, for Selena and Sin.
Is not miracle???

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CDAIINmp4s&feature=related

minus

Today in Riga was -16` C.
When you breath in, you feel like thousand knifes is scraping you inside...
When you breath out, you feel like you throw your soul away...
I am so cold...
Beautiful snow lies around, making you feel being in a paradise of ice-cream. The sky is so blue, light-blue. Sun is trying to warm the ground, but it seems like helpless actions of desperate God.
And I am so, so cold !!!

Do you know what I want now more than anything else?
...to have enough warmth and some chocolates.

Responsibility

I'm very busy person now - studies, hobbies, work, friends, family...
Now I am going to work in Student Council as Head of Sport department. Already one year I was just a member in SC (helping to those who stand above me), but now I am going to take so huge responsibility...

Mm... I like to be so busy and managing. Like something depends on me! Like I am so important in this society...
Probably I really am :)

...and never will change

I would like to start with my favourite phrase ''i don't know why''...
Yes, and again i do not know why, but i found out my biggest problem of life.

Paradox, I need love, but when somebody wants to present this great feeling, i do everything not to receive it. WHY?

They are nice guys, mostly, but when they show their attitude to me, i hide mine! Not only hide, but totally close my heart to him. The last thing - I spoil everything by terminating friendship and any contact with this person.

I hurt so many people! I hurt very cute and intelligent guys!

And then I cry of loneliness...

True blood

Eric is real. I knew. Will meet him soon. Mmm... and he will drink my blood :D :D :D

Today

Let me explain to  you, dear blog,
I write here not only emotions and facts of my or my friends life, but also bullshit, just to spoil free space on this page.

Today I realized, that nobody really can keep anybody near without wish from both sides. So, I AM FREE from everybody! I DO NOT NEED ANYBODY! I love him, and her as well, my best friends... But I DO NOT NEED ANYBODY just to prove myself that I am alive... I am alive without doing anything...


I have future, don't I ???? Nobody can play this role but me, cause it's my life - nobody knows how to play better, right ? RIGHT !!!!

I will leave this place, this time, this life, just to start something new !!! Brand-new start, from a pieces of my heart...


...and I will not blame myself if somebody has been hurt cause of me - it's never a fault of anybody... People can't be hurt without willing.